


Weak Standstill

by AWormWillTurn



Category: the raven cycle
Genre: M/M, also, and, catch me writing about Noah, he really misses Noah, i also really miss Noah, what he means: if I would have told you about my dreams ..., wow mood
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-22
Updated: 2018-09-12
Packaged: 2019-06-30 23:03:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,515
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15761520
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AWormWillTurn/pseuds/AWormWillTurn
Summary: (Get it, it’s the opposite of power moves)Ronan wonders what life would have been like if they’d never met Blue. Adam is that one meme with the guy blinkingThis is just a collection of wholesome drabbles for when I’m not working on my own stuff, I don’t know where I was going with it I was just full of angstThere will be another collection of drabbkes coming up soon but that one is extra gay™️Anyway enjoy





	1. Chapter 1

“What if things were different?” 

Adam glanced over his shoulders on reflex. He’d been aware of Ronan’s lazy figure lying on the ground behind him while he worked on his summer project— a red Toyota MR2 that had been abandoned at the shop by its previous owner after they’d gotten the bill for some sort of muffler trouble. It would have been scrapped to pieces if Adam hadn’t offered to do something with it, much to his boss’s surprise. It would have cost them more to have it towed off, anyway— but he assumed this would be one of Ronan’s infamous “silent drop-bys” which often pretailed his random appearing and disappearing without a word in between. 

On good days, which happened more often now, Adam liked to think Ronan just liked to enjoy his presence around the farm. On bad days—well. He was still there wasn’t he? He hadn’t thrown him off his property yet. Hadn’t grown bored of him yet. 

He didn’t like where his thoughts were headed. 

“Are you okay?” One dusty-brown brow lifted. 

Ronan blew a steady breath through lips pressed thin and rubbed a hand across his head before propping himself upright. 

If Adam didn’t know any better, and he did, he would say Ronan was grappling with an unseen adversary in his head. Which he probably was.

Blue eyes finally locked onto bluer eyes and Adam felt a shiver, which had nothing to do with the horrendously humid Virginia summer, shoot down his spine. 

“What if we hadn’t gone out for pizza? What if we went out for -fuck, I don’t know, gelato?” 

Adam made a face, dropping his tools and wiping the sweat off the back of his neck before bridging the gap between them, stopping short at a comfortable distance that was still close enough that Adam could kick one of Ronan’s boots if he wanted to. 

He didn’t like the rising dread settling between his ribs. “Like recently? Or...”

“If we would have gone anywhere else but Nino’s you’d never laid eyes on Sargent. Gansey wouldn’t had to talk to her for you.”

Ah, so the adversary had a name. Guilt. 

“Ronan—“

“I’m not saying it’s your fault, before you start that self deprecating shit. I’m just saying if we never saw Sargent that night-“

“If we hadn’t met Blue maybe Gansey wouldn’t have died again. Maybe Noah would still be here. This is all Blue’s doing.” Adam said, careful.

Ronan made a strangled noise deep in his throat that could have otherwise been mistake for mirthless laugh. If you were anyone but Adam Parrish or Richard Campbell Gansey III. 

Richard Campbell Gansey III. 

He could deny it until he was blue in the face but Gansey meant more to Ronan than blood. More than his life. Gansey was his first love, and there, standing right before Ronan’s sorry figure, Adam realized he finally understood what having a first love really entailed. 

“I’m not saying it’s her fault, I’m just saying ‘What if’?”

“I think this is the most you’ve spoken all day.”

“Jesus, Mary and Joseph,” Ronan spat, pulling himself up so quickly Adam winced back without his consciousness’ permission. 

“Ronan, c’mon!” Adam called watching his retreating figure. “Don’t be childish.”

“Go work on your stupid car. I don’t want to talk to you right now.”

Adam sighed. I don’t want to talk to you right now didn’t mean it was the end of the conversation. 

Adam was correct.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am full of one (1) emotion™️ And that emotion™️ Is loving Adam Parrish

“I can’t believe you’ve never seen Fight Club, Sargent. Everyone. Has. Seen. Fight Club.”

Adam was just quick enough to slide his bowl of popcorn to side of the couch before Ronan knocked it over as he dropped himself besides it. His head was dangerously close to Blue’s colorfully socked foot, the mischievous flash in her eyes didn’t go unnoticed.

“Fight club sounds disgustingly hyper-masculine.” Blue said breezily. She pulled her spoon from between her lips, examined it for any remnants of cool whip and blueberries, and then stuck it back in her bowl. It was the closest thing Ronan had to yogurt and Blue, ever the addict, hadn’t the willpower to turn it away. 

Ronan snorted, yanking a pillow under his head with all the agitated grace Adam had grown seasoned to. “Do you always have to sound like a tumblr post?”

Blue smacked her lips together, jabbing her spoon in Ronan’s general direction. Her foot just inches for the top of his skull. “Do you always have to sound like a neanderthal?”

Ronan dragged a pillow over his face and said, “who even invited you?”

Adam sputtered a laugh that was mostly feeling and not sound. Blue, sprawled against his chest gave one loud, “ha!”

In unison the two said, “you did.”

Ronan could have burned holes into that pillow with his glare alone. Adam thought he might even throw it at them, but instead he sighed and folded his hands against his stomach. “You’re missing your other two heads, Beast. Where are they anyway?”

Blue set her empty bowl on the floor then made herself comfortable against Adam in a way that made the top of her hair, wind-wild as ever, tickle adam’s nose. Her left ankle was a whisper away from Ronan’s ear. 

Adam thought he’d implode if she didn’t take her chance. The compulsion was maddening... Blue continued as if she hadn’t noticed. 

“They said they’d be here late. Henry wanted to show Gansey something new.” 

“Does this new thing involve taking their pants off?” Ronan offered, blindly grasping for the remote on the coffee table besides him. 

“Don’t be...uh...” Adam started. He’d spent the last 3 hours learning the layout of his new campus, meeting financial aid counselors, signing papers and calling references. At one point he had to call home for some missing information and the 60 seconds that passed before his mother finally answered had taken a few years off his life. More years still when she hung up at the sound of his voice forcing him to dial again in front of university staff. Eventually, she’d given him the information he needed and briskly dropped the call. Somehow this had left him exhausted. 

“Scurrilous?” Blue offered and Adam was so sure she was finally going to kick him. 

“Offensive.” Adam nodded. 

“You’re all starting to sound like Gansey. It’s sick.” Ronan said, sounding only partially disuaged. The comfort of routine had softened the worst of it. 

This, sleepovers with Blue, late nights with Blue, double features with Blue, and sometimes, mostly Gansey and Henry, was the new normal for them. 

And no matter what Ronan might have been considering early that week, he knew that this was how it was always supposed to be. 

But the conversation wasn’t over, Adam thought, eyeing the way Blue wiggled her toes on either side of Ronan’s head. 

Ronan’s face-pillow suddenly flipped forward, hitting the wall with a thud at the same time that he pressed play on the remote. The electric prickle of the TV coming to life gave Adam goosebumps up his arms. Ronan glanced up at Blue’s foot. His eyes narrowed, “Don’t even think about it.”

It would take only a bit of smooth maneuvering on his part, and if he did it too fast or too slow he might end up hurting someone, but Adam was confident in his decision.

it was either now or never. 

Before Blue had the chance to open her mouth Adam jerked his knee against her’s at just the right angle that her body has no choice but to involuntarily flex ramrod straight—effectively connecting the sole of her foot with Ronan’s head. 

Adam couldn’t tell who had hollered the loudest, had it been Ronan’s “WHAT DID I SAY, MAGGOT?”

Or Blue’s fantastic rendition of everyone’s favorite Vine, “ADAM!”

Adam practically howled with laughter as he leapt away from the oncoming storm of pillows heading his way from both directions. 

It had been worth it.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The world knows I love Ronsey and don’t know where I’m going with this story wooooo

Time held the inappreciable ability to heal all wounds but Ronan’s jealousy was an overlap of lacerations deep enough to scar. Angry and admonishing, neither practice nor reprimand could soften it. There would be no leather band big enough to cover it, nothing he could do to hide it. The second something of his stopped tending -or bending- to his will Ronan could do nothing but glare, stuffing the monstrous duplicity down, down, down. His capacity for resentment made Ronan needlessly miserable.

Which was why Henry’s sleeping head in Gansey’s lap made his stomach churn. Ronan’s teeth found the comfortable bitterness of his bands, he pulled hard and chewed. 

“That can’t possibly be good for your teeth.” Gansey sighed, his fingers carefully maneuvering Henry’s face away from the zipper of his god awful khakis. 

Ronan’s interest in Gansey had hardly ever been carnal, but the mere thought made Ronan want to throw something against a wall. 

Something of Cheng’s. 

“Didn’t think you cared so much about my oral health.” Ronan replied. He set his drink down, exhaled loudly and leaned back into the couch. 

Adam and Blue had fallen asleep against each other on the other side of living room ages ago. Gansey and Cheng had arrived to the Barn’s first impromptu overnighter three hours late and reeking of pool water. Gansey’s hair was still wild (and wet?) from exertion, looking nothing like the carefully put-together illuminato one would have him seem. 

Gansey mirrored Ronan’s position besides the couch, modified only because Henry was a dead weight between his legs. “I care very much about your overall health, as well.” 

He stopped, blinked a few times and then locked eyes with Ronan. “What time did Jane get here?”

As disconnected as Gansey’s thought process seemed, time had trained Ronan’s expectations—somehow he’d bridge the two sentiments together, innateness trumping intricacies in a way that would make Ronan feel dumb for not catching it sooner.

He shrugged his shoulders and said, “Parrish dropped her off after work, so maybe five o’clock? Could have been six.”

Gansey made a face, his fingers habitually finding his bottom lip. “She had a doctors appointment at four, I wonder if she made it. I could always reschedule-“

“You are all types of hopefulness.”

“If it’s not broke,” Gansey shrugged one shoulder, his hand moving back down to caress Cheng’s chin. Henry had the indecency to purr. 

Ronan, who was nothing if not a creature of habit, scowled. “I’m sure the two other members of your weird little ongoing threesome can handle making their own appointments, dude.” 

Gansey made a face that slowly gave way to stretched out yawn. He pulled off his glasses and ran a hand through his hair until he was nothing but gloriously disheveled. “It’s not weird.”

“You didn’t say it wasn’t an ongoing threesome, though.”

“Ronan.”

“Whomst?”

Gansey’s lips became one thin line Ronan wanted to prod with his fingers. “Sometimes I think you’re jealous of Jane and it causes you to act out.”

Or maybe a fireiron. 

He wanted to say that he sounded like an idiot. Sargent was an issue, sure, but she was old news. News he could live with and did. The dwarf, Ronan mused, sparing a sideways glance at her rumpled body slumped over besides Adam’s similarly sleeping figure, was no one worth getting envious over. 

But Cheng —an outsider of the worst kind. 

“I didn’t think you liked guys.” Ronan said with the white hot realization that his tongue had just betrayed the rest of him. 

Gansey straightened, his eyes following Ronan’s gaze towards Henry’s face. Something in his face —maybe the unexpectant part— softened and Ronan has to fight the urge to grab the nearest popcorn bowl and throw it—just so he had an excuse to end the conversation. Because that’s what it was about to become, with Gansey, a conversation. 

Gansey said, “I never really had much time to figure out where I fell along the Kinsey scale.” 

“Who says shit like that, man. The Kinsey scale?”

“I think I’m about a three, possible a four—maybe a five.”

“Woa, relax there. You’ve only ever liked Cheng, it might be a one time thing.”

The other boy had the nerve to look crossed. “You think Henry’s the only boy I’ve ever loved?”

“Your daddy doesn’t count.”

“Ronan.”

“The Pig doesn’t count either, sorry man.”

“Ronan.”

“Glendower definitely doesn’t fucking count” Ronan scoffed.

“Ronan!”

Blue snorted, both boys tuned in her direction fully expecting a snide remark or a warning to shut it because at least two people in the room had work early in the morning. But, instead, her head lulled back and she continued to dream. 

“Henry is not the only boy I’ve ever loved, and most certainly won’t be the last and I have Jane to thank for that.” Gansey finally said. 

“What?” 

“To feel the way I do—to fully feel it and accept it and not try to change it. Even if it doesn’t make sense, she reminds me that affections and consciousness rarely go hand-in-hand but It doesn’t make either any less authentic. I loved glendower, I loved the pig, I love Henrietta, I love Jane and Henry and Adam and—“

Ronan’s lips had parted, his mouth felt dry and his ears ached as if preparing for something impossibly loud. Earth-shatteringly so. 

Gansey smiled at him then, the type of smile that highlighted his dimples and turned his hazel eyes to sunlit honey. In a kinder voice, he said, “and I loved and will continue to love you, Ronan Lynch. Until the day i die and every day after.”

There was a strange magic, not unlike his ability to dream, that Gansey and his endless menagerie of words possessed over him. He knew, he’d always known, that Richard Campbell Gansey III, magnificent sap that he was, loved him, truly loved him. But he couldn’t think of a time where he had said it out loud. Consequently, Gansey must had known how Ronan felt about him. He’d never made it a secret, but he also hadn’t made it public.

But it was all out in the open now. 

Ronan was euphoric.

Though, like with most things, and despite his affinity for languages, all Ronan could respond with was a sharp-toothed grin and a, “are you saying you want to make your weird ongoing threesome into a foursome?”

Gansey choked on his laughter. “Ronan.”

“We can add Parrish while we’re at it—make it a goddamn orgy.”

“Enough,” Gansey said, through his brilliant smile. “I’m starting to think you'd actually be into it.” 

“Oh yeah, I constantly lay awake at night thinking about getting it in with Sargent. Get real.”

Gansey rolled his eyes, breathed in the apple scented air of the barns, and then let it all out. “I’m glad.”

Ronan cocked his head, fatigue biting at the corner of his eyeslids making them heavy. “About?”

“I finally said it. You know now.”

“Thanks to Sargent.”

Gansey nodded. 

“Gansey.” Ronan started. 

The other boy merely hummed in response. 

“I’m glad you said it too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey thanks for sticking around kiddos let me know what you think about this

**Author's Note:**

> I might write more whomst knows


End file.
